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View Full Version : FEMA Alert - Do not drink water!

TinyUFB
03-20-2006, 12:11 PM
It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, after one year we will have absorbed 1 kilo of the Escherichia coli bacteria usually found in feces.

In other words, we will have consumed 1 liter of shit.

However, we don't run that risk when we drink beer, whiskey, rum or other liquors because the creation of alcohol involves a distillation process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.


It is my duty to communicate to all of you who are drinking water to stop doing so as it has been scientifically proven that it is unhealthy and therefore bad for you.

Water = Shit

Alcohol = Health

Free yourself of shit, drink alcohol!!! It's better to drink alcohol and talk shit than to drink water and be full of shit!


And we thought Sin was making booze for a hobby. :stunned:
Mr.Sinister
03-20-2006, 07:45 PM
As you may know I am a Dr.Professor of Rocket surgery. It is my opinion that it is o.k. to drink water if you drink it in and equal amount of alcohol. If you daily water intake is say one gallon of water. Then you should drink a gallon of Scotch in that same day. If you are unable to drink that much Scotch then reduce your water intake accordingly to the level of Scotch in witch you will be able to consume. If you can not afford to drink Scotch then substitute 5 gallons of beer to each 1 gallon of Scotch that should have been consumed. I.E. 5 liters of beer for every 1 liter of water if you measure your water intake in liters. Signed Dr.Professor Jack Mehoff Chief of rocket surgery OHSU.
nibs75
03-20-2006, 07:49 PM
I think a good mix of tequila will do the job as well. Perhaps 3 shots per / liter of H20. If you take the molecular mass of tequila and multiply it by 14 you get... drunk dumbass...:lol:
Mr.Sinister
03-20-2006, 07:53 PM
I think a good mix of tequila will do the job as well. Perhaps 3 shots per / liter of H20. If you take the molecular mass of tequila and multiply it by 14 you get... drunk dumbass...:lol:What is the mole of Tequila? Are you using non Euclidian geometery to figure this out? Mister binary smartass.:drink:
nibs75
03-20-2006, 08:36 PM
What is the mole of Tequila? Are you using non Euclidian geometery to figure this out? Mister binary smartass.:drink:

Actually, I used gas chromatagraphy, in combination with gravimetric analysis.:huh:
Mr.Sinister
03-20-2006, 08:37 PM
Did that involve using an acid and a centrafuge?:lol:
nibs75
03-20-2006, 08:40 PM
Did that involve using an acid and a centrafuge?:lol:

It was more like patron and a beer bong...:goofy:
FrankZ
03-20-2006, 08:43 PM
more likely some Orange Juice and a Blender
SmokeShowin
03-20-2006, 09:18 PM
patron

Mmmm...
jrod1970
03-20-2006, 10:38 PM
:happy: cant we all just ride along!
TinyUFB
03-20-2006, 10:43 PM
:happy: cant we all just ride along!


If you buy we'll ride! :jamming:
jrod1970
03-20-2006, 10:46 PM
If you buy we'll ride! :jamming: :freak: lets rock!!!