Evil Lurker
07-08-2009, 02:10 PM
I'm still laughing at this one...
Yesterday I went down to the river with some friends and had a bunch of alcohol. Well, for some reason the motion in the river on the boat coupled with a bunch of yager activated my bowels. Naturally it was a tuesday afternoon and all the marinas were closed so a proper shitter was out of the question. And since I didn't have my own boat I was more or less stuck where I was. It so happened that at the time things reached critical pressure I was on a beach where several people were swimming so I couldn't exactly crap behind a bush. The only sensible thing, hell the only thing, left to do was to drop trou and shit in the water.
Well turns out I had the liquishits pushing on a large torpedo.
So without going into further details at this point, the goddamn thing was a big ass fucking floater along with some little assorted turdlets. Now I'm not that inconsiderate, I did shit about 30 feet or so from where our boat was parked and I thought that the current would catch it and carry it on down away from everyone and I could retain some dignity. But for some reason the fucking bastard started floating upriver to where everyone was swimming. I've heard rumors of this, and its true, you shit in the water and turds WILL follow you!
Well after playing cool for a little while and acting like nothnig had happened, the hilarity ensued. Somoene spotted the turd slowly floating towards them and it was like a scene out of JAWS with everyone running up on the bank and getting into their boats. At that point me and my lady friend decided to relocate after that but luckily for me nobody figured out who did it.
I'm sorry I know its TMI, but dammit that was the funniest thing I've done in years.
Yesterday I went down to the river with some friends and had a bunch of alcohol. Well, for some reason the motion in the river on the boat coupled with a bunch of yager activated my bowels. Naturally it was a tuesday afternoon and all the marinas were closed so a proper shitter was out of the question. And since I didn't have my own boat I was more or less stuck where I was. It so happened that at the time things reached critical pressure I was on a beach where several people were swimming so I couldn't exactly crap behind a bush. The only sensible thing, hell the only thing, left to do was to drop trou and shit in the water.
Well turns out I had the liquishits pushing on a large torpedo.
So without going into further details at this point, the goddamn thing was a big ass fucking floater along with some little assorted turdlets. Now I'm not that inconsiderate, I did shit about 30 feet or so from where our boat was parked and I thought that the current would catch it and carry it on down away from everyone and I could retain some dignity. But for some reason the fucking bastard started floating upriver to where everyone was swimming. I've heard rumors of this, and its true, you shit in the water and turds WILL follow you!
Well after playing cool for a little while and acting like nothnig had happened, the hilarity ensued. Somoene spotted the turd slowly floating towards them and it was like a scene out of JAWS with everyone running up on the bank and getting into their boats. At that point me and my lady friend decided to relocate after that but luckily for me nobody figured out who did it.
I'm sorry I know its TMI, but dammit that was the funniest thing I've done in years.